Always tailing me....

[SHARKLADY16]

Clowns always sense that I'm deathly petrified of them.
You know that when your little boy is hanging around single grown men in make-up, fur feathers, and pouffy wigs that something's not right. :shock:
Anyways, I was at a fair with my friend. There was a clown.
He was looking directly at me.
This was a crowd of at least 400 people or so.
I kept thinking to myself "I knew I shouldn't have worn a bikini to this place!" :cry:
But the clown kept staring at me even when I put on my friend's jacket.
Then the creep starting following me around. When I ducked and hid in the bushes, The clown started saying all this crap like "What are you?
Racially prejudiced? Huh? A member of the NAACP? Huh? What are you?
One of those discriminatory a$$holes who calls everyone she meets a freak?"
I really could not believe how dumb this guy was. :(
Then he threw a bunch of water balloons at me and started chasing me!
I guess he enjoyed seeing me have an anxiety attack.
Needless to say, my friend couldn't do anything because she was in a wheelchair and that's no match for those screwed up clowns. :roll:

[King_Louie]

Clowns do have a sixth sense (I see scared people...) to pick out people with coulrophobia. But...

Wearing a bikini to a crowded place besides the beach: not a good idea. Except when you're like Lara Croft, and you just kill anyone staring at you. But that's just a movie and a game! Don't try that at home! :wink:

Furthermore, wheelchairs can be fitted with rocketturrets, machineguns, etc. Can it? :? 8)

:o

[DownWithTheClowns]

I've also learned wearing a bikini anywhere else but the beach or pool is a bad idea.. nothing having to with clowns tho, thank god.

anyhow- like KL said, just attach machine guns to each side of the wheel chair.

but that just sounds awful, Sharklady :( but that's why you're here, coz you'll always get support from us fellow clown haters (or demoralizers, lol, right KL? :wink: )

[King_Louie]

Damn right! * demoralizes * 8)

:o

[simienne]

We all know that many a clown is not only, um, a clown, but a scary pervert too. And a clown with a chip on his shoulder is even less funny! Just as well you a friend with you at all I say. Moral support and all that. You'll find many friends here, Sharklady. :) And plenty of haters, loathers, and yessirreeebob, even demoralisers! Haha.

[SHARKLADY16]

I feel so much better! :D
Anyways, My cousin was a clown. :cry: I had to put up with that sh*t for a loooong time. :cry:

[simienne]

And how was it? Having a clown in the family?

[SHARKLADY16]

Very, very scary. :shock:

[simienne]

I bet.
My uncle used to do impressions of hamsters getting stuck in the toilet. THAT was a bit scary too. No clowns as far as I am aware though. Seems like I got off lightly! :)

[King_Louie]

Hamsters getting stuck in the toilet? How can you possibly do an impression of that? :?

[simienne]

I know. It'd have to be a bloody big hamster. He sort of pushed his arms out, and squeezed his eyes shut. Bit like a mime artist. Oohhh. Not good. Uncle Eddie also did a mean impression of a self-basting turkey. Actually, I quite liked that one... *chuckles to self*.

[King_Louie]

I'd like to meet that uncle. He sounds funny. And if he appears to be a clown or a mime, we can always kick the shit out of him! How's that for a plan? :wink:

[simienne]

He might be an idiot, but he's still family. I can't have you lot kicking the cr*p out of my Unc!

[RaBiDwOlF]

I hear ya there. I was at this farmer's market thing last Saturday with my boyfriend, and while he was selling his pottery I was just strummin' my guitar, and all of a sudden a freakish guy clown walks into my line of vision from the left side of the park, and he spots me and stares for about fifteen seconds before making his way over. Then he honks his nose at me, laughs, and walks off. :cry: I was frightened for the rest of the day, and I kept keeping an eye out for the freak, but I didn't see him again, thank Gandhi. :x

[King_Louie]

Farmers eey... PITCHFORKS!

I'm kinda of an almost farmer myself, and I can tell you, the best weapons in our war against clowns are pitchforks and tractors! :D

[simienne]

Speaking of which: are scarecrows a bit clownlike to any of you?

[King_Louie]

Scarecrows back here are usually a piece of plastic on a stick. Not very clowny... :D

:o

[simienne]

Doesn't sound much like it would scare any crows either. Or me! Woo-hoo! I am moving to the Netherlands :D

[King_Louie]

That's why there are also hunters with guns and dogs and everything. In case the scarecrows don't work. 8)

[simienne]

I don't like guns.

[King_Louie]

Me neither. Those sobs call themselfs sportsmen, but hunting down a small bird with a 12 gauge shotgun isn't really a sport. And after they shot it, do they walk to go pick it up? Noooo... They send a dog to do it.

Fortunately, most farmers use gascanons here. These just produce a big bang (not that one) to scare the birds away.

[simienne]

Would that work with clowns? I have to go to a big fair next weekend...

[King_Louie]

What, a gascanon or guns and dogs?

Maybe a combination of both! :D

[SHARKLADY16]

Someone who works as a clown.....Looks perfectly okay without the makeup, then goes off to their job. :shock:
I guess if I really really loved the person, I could put up with it. :cry:

[simienne]

What, a gascanon or guns and dogs?

Maybe a combination of both! :D

I think so! :D
Something I can slip in my pocket would be better. I am going to be wearing my "i hate clowns" t-shirt. It's great. Like psychological armour. :D

[simienne]

Someone who works as a clown.....Looks perfectly okay without the makeup, then goes off to their job. :shock:
I guess if I really really loved the person, I could put up with it. :cry:

Sorry Love, you've lost me...

[King_Louie]

Same here.

Total confuzzlement has struck me... :?

[SHARKLADY16]

What I meant is if you were dating a person and you found out they worked as a clown! :P

[King_Louie]

Whoo! Dating!

[simienne]

Whoo! Dating!
Does owning a porn shed count as dating, Louie? :P I am assuming that even self-proclaimed geeks date occasionally? :lol:
I wouldn't date a clown. Or any man in make-up to be quite honest with you, SharkLady. Haha!

[King_Louie]

Dating requires a social life.

I rest my case.

[simienne]

But you shop on-line, I thought you might be into on-line dating too.... Sorry darlin'.